Child arrangements guide

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Making arrangements for your children following a separation can be both difficult and emotional.  We work with you to find solutions that have your children's best interests at their heart.

What are child arrangements?

We understand that a relationship breaking down and separating can be very difficult to come to terms with, especially when children are involved. Settling into a new routine as quickly as possible can help, which is why agreeing the arrangements for your children is one of the most important things to work out. Our child arrangements solicitors have a wealth of practical and legal experience in this area and can help you with a range of issues. 

At it’s most basic, child arrangements means the living arrangements for children after their parents separate. This includes everything from where they’ll live and go to school to who else they’ll spend time with and how holidays will be split. 

It’s important to remember that every family is different! What works for one family might not work for another. And what works at the beginning (perhaps with a very young child) is very likely to evolve and change as time goes on. 

Your child might see their other parent at their home, in a public place, at a relative’s home, at your home or in a contact centre. Many children stay overnight with their other parent regularly. Others see their other parent for shorter periods in the daytime. Some children go to their other parent for long periods during the school holidays and others will have regular weekend visits.

There’s no one right way to do it. What’s important is to find a way that works for your child and your family. 

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Do I have to go to court? 

We’ll always try to help you settle your dispute through mediation or negotiation if that is the best option. Not only are these options generally much quicker and less stressful than going to court, you are much more likely to end up with an arrangement that works long-term for your family and which promotes a good co-parenting relationship with your ex.  

Some parents find it useful to make a parenting plan. This isn’t legally binding but does get you thinking about the different things you and your ex will need to agree on.  

However, we know that sometimes it’s not possible to mediate or even negotiate. If you do need to go to court, we can help. There are different types of court order you can apply for.

  • Child arrangements order – this sets out which parent your child will live with and how much time they will spend with the other parent (lots of people still refer to this as custody and access or contact and residence).
  • Prohibited steps order – this stops you or the other parent from doing something for example changing your child’s surname or moving abroad with your child.
  • Specific issue order – this deals with a particular issue or dispute, for example, where your child will go to school or whether they should receive a particular vaccine.

In these situations we have the knowledge and experience to help you through the court process and to get the best outcome for you and your children.

What can I do if the current arrangements aren’t working? 

It is not uncommon for one parent (or both) to want or need to change what’s been agreed or has been ordered by the court. After all, circumstances will change over time as will a child’s needs. For example, a change of job or a house move may mean the original arrangements simply no longer work.

Whether or not your arrangements are set out in a court order, you must always try and discuss the change with the other parent first and see if they agree. If you are finding that difficult, consider using mediation or solicitor-led negotiation. Failing that, you may need to go to court and persuade a judge that changing the arrangements is in your child’s best interests.  

Importantly, if you already have a court order setting out the arrangements for your child, remember that that order is legally binding. If one parent breaks (or breaches) the order there can be some very serious consequences. At the top of all child arrangements orders there is a warning notice that sets out the consequences if the order is ignored. Until the order has been formally changed by the court, you must do what the order says, even if you disagree.  

Unfortunately, there are times when one parent deliberately refuses to follow the arrangements agreed or set out in a court order. Although it is possible to go back to court to enforce any order you already have, the best first step is to try and discuss with the other parent why they are not following the order. Minor breaches can sometimes be quite easy to resolve if you are able to talk about why it’s happening and what you can do to make sure it doesn’t happen again. 

If you find it difficult to communicate directly with each other, then mediation can be helpful.  

If going back to court is your only option, then you will need to persuade the court that:

  • it is beyond reasonable doubt that the other parent broke the order 
  • enforcement is necessary to make sure the order is complied with
  • there is no reasonable excuse for the other parent failing to comply with the order

If the court agrees that the order needs to be enforced, then there are different things the court can do. They might decide that the parent breaching the order should carry out unpaid work or pay compensation to the other parent. In cases where there has been significant and persistent breaches of an order, the court has ordered a change to where a child lives or even imprisoned the parent.  

How we can help

No matter what’s going on between you and your child’s other parent, it’s important to put your child’s interests first. What’s best for them should be at the heart of your decisions. 

Many of the parents we work with recognise and work hard to minimise the impact of any disagreements on their children. We too are committed to reducing conflict wherever possible to make the process easier for you and your family. What we are known for in particular is our ability to successfully deal with high-conflict separations as well as highly sensitive cases involving allegations of sexual abuse, alcohol addiction and domestic abuse – often where there are simultaneous police investigations and criminal proceedings. We work closely with professionals such as child psychologists and family therapists to find a child-centred solution.

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Our team of specialist family lawyers are here to support you if you're facing issues related to child arrangements. Speak to our team today. 

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Resources

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Facing a family law issue and not sure what's involved? Our podcast is the right place to start.

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Our family and children law blog provides practical advice and insight on a wide range of topics by our family and children lawyers.

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On our YouTube channel, Caitlin Jenkins, the Family Law Vlogger gives you guidance on your first step in sorting out your issues.

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Child arrangements FAQs

Yes, a child arrangements order made by the Family Court is legally binding.  

The overriding consideration in family proceedings is the question of "what is in the best interests of the child?" In answering this question, the court are guided by a list of things to take into account known as the "welfare checklist". This includes the child's wishes and feelings, the child's physical, emotional and educational needs and the ability of each parent to meet those needs. You can find the full welfare checklist in section 1 of the Children Act 1989.  

Generally, a child arrangements order lasts until the child's 18th birthday. 

"Custody" and "access" were the concepts and terms used to describe arrangements for children about 30 years ago. Broadly, custody meant who the child would live with and access meant who the child would spend time with. 

In 1989, the terms changed to "residence" and "contact". And then they changed again in 2014 to "child arrangements" which covers both who the child should live with and who they should spend time with.  

Although custody, access, residence and contact are still commonly used phrases, within the family law world they are considered completely out of date and misleading.  

The following people can apply for a child arrangements order without needing to ask the court first for permission:

  • a parent, guardian or special guardian of the child
  • a spouse or civil partner if the child is part of that family
  • someone with parental responsibility for the child
  • someone who already has a residence order for that child
  • someone who the child has lived with for more than three years

Grandparents, who do not meet any of the criteria above, have to apply to the court for permission before applying for an order.

A child arrangements order is an order which sets out who a child should live with, spend time with or otherwise have contact with.

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